Your next reads…Marianne Williamson?

So I’m probably way late to the game in discovering Marianne, but hey at least I finally arrived. This isn’t going to be book reviews, but rather more of a for your information post. I started my spiritual journey with Wayne Dyer and was forever grateful for him presenting what I was feeling in my soul into simple words and concepts that I could understand and follow. I ventured out to many other spiritual authors, but always came back to Wayne. The others would get too caught up in holier than thou attitudes that instantly make my middle finger pop up.

Marianne leads me deeper into my spiritual journey where Wayne left off. I’ve known for the last few years that Love is my “thing” that deeply resonates within my soul and bubbles up. Marianne has shown me why and is helping guide me further along.

Some items I highlighted from A return to Love:

The perfect you is the love within you.

We’re like the spokes on a wheel, all radiating out from the same center.

Go for the light and darkness will disappear.

But God doesn’t need us to police the universe. Shaking our finger at someone doesn’t help them change.

asking that they be used as instruments through which the world is healed.

Few people have wronged us like we’ve wronged ourselves.

I’ve just started reading The gift of change. Here’s some items I highlighted so far:

when you’re worried about whether the human race is going to survive the next century, it feels odd to mention it at lunch.

The darkness is an invitation to light,

The world we see reflects the people we’ve become, and if we do not like what we see in the world, we must face what we don’t like within ourselves.

Okay. I’m done writing about my crush on Marianne. I have a pretty good vibe on our little posse here on WP, and believe you’ll find these books enlightening.

*** One thing I missed when I first published***

Pretty darn interesting fact! She ran for President in 2020!! Thank you, Rox, for the reminder😊

Sending peace and much love,

Dwight

You aren’t alone

With the holidays coming up I wanted to get this Truth out to you.

NO MATTER WHAT YOU ARE FEELING YOU MUST REMEMBER THIS.

You are loved.

You are love.

It’s your birthright from Spirit, and Spirit never leaves us on this journey. It is within and also around us always. Spirit to you may be described as Love, God, Great Spirit, Allah,… The key is it’s that knowing within your soul and behind everything. A Oneness. All you need to do is sit, get out of your head, and let your heart reconnect to this love and feel the light from within start to glow.

Next, the best way to feel this love is to give love and spread joy. This time of year there are plenty of organizations asking for toys for children who are in need. Also don’t forget our elders. Check your local newspaper or local news. Call a senior center to see what you could do. There’s still time to send out cards and home made cards are the best! Get off your butt (saying this lovingly) and spread some joy.

Lastly, put up some decorations, snap a picture, and post it here. We are here for you and have plenty of love to wrap you in.

BELIEVE,

Dwight

Old and young

This is my dog Boris. I think he’s maybe 12 or 13 years old, but not sure since when we got him from the pound they didn’t know. Out of my 3 dogs he use to be the alpha, full of muscles and energy. Now that he’s in his retirement years he no longer is alpha and sleeps most of the days. He gets squeezed to last when zipping out the back door and can no longer go on long walks with the other two dogs.

The other day though I switched it up. I usually have to go on two walks. On short one with Boris, and a longer one with Miley and Dude. We decided we’d all go on a short walk. You have to understand Boris’s walks now are extremely slow and the bad ass prance is no longer and instead it more like a wobble to the point it looks painful…but every day he still gets excited to get out and walk. So what I noticed with my other two is that they adapted quite nicely. They slowed right down to his pace and kept turning around and checking on him. And for Boris I think he enjoyed being back in the pack.

Watching this made me think. In general in our culture we tend to split the young from the old. I think a lot of it is because we think the younger ones don’t have the time, patience, or we just don’t want to “burden” them with the process. As we turned back onto my street and were heading home, I thought this is good for my other 2 dogs. This is real and one day they too will become seniors. It’s good for them to learn patience, empathy, and understanding. In the end they all adapted and enjoyed themselves.

We can learn a lot from dogs,

Dwight

Going alcohol free wasn’t as easy as it might of looked

* Please understand I am a binge drinker and can’t handle just having one. It just doesn’t work for me, but I am by no means judging others who can partake. I’m not looking for any type of “good job Dwight”. I’m just hoping this helps someone who is on this journey. It’s not easy.

You might know that I quit alcohol February 19, 2019. It may have appeared I just decided to quit and I was off and running. Well here’s a peak back into my journal to 10-25-2015.

10-20-2015 entry

“Toying with the idea of quitting alcohol. I’ve thrown beers from the fridge into the garbage 3 times now. That little soul voice within keeps whispering it’s time. 35 plus years. I’m a little nervous of what Courtney, Jeff, Lori and Dave will think, but it’s my body my choice and I must start unfolding and being me.

Why quit now? 35 years of drinking is enough. Don’t like the tears it brings after many drinks. Makes me feel bad afterwards – not clean. Don’t like the hangovers. Too much spending on it. Worry about driving. Eating too much while drinking. Not good for my health – brain, liver, skin. Trying to live a cleaner spiritual life – doesn’t fit in. Don’t like possible actions it could cause. Bad role model for my kids. Bad breath, burbs, and not being sober around them. Makes me more emotional, angry at times during and after.”


So here’s my broken record to all of you. Two things. Don’t wait..look at my example 35 years quickly turned to 40 years before it finally clicked. In between I experienced more of the same above year after year. And believe me there were numerous attempts to quit prior to all that. I know I know you hear this all the time from us sober fricks, but for me life is so so much better when not living in the fog! Secondly, don’t EVER give up! One day it will click! 😊

Peace,

Dwight

Debt 3: What to do?

So let’s start right off with a visual.  This is my example of paying off $35,500 in debt in 4 years. 

Begin Balance $35,500.00
Current Balance ($1.00)
   
Total Payments $35,501.00
   
2015 June $400.00
2015 July $400.00
2015 August $400.00
2015 September $400.00
2015 October $500.00
2015 November $500.00
2015 December $600.00
2016 January $600.00
2016 February $600.00
2016 March $800.00
2016 April $400.00
2016 May $400.00
2016 June $400.00
2016 July $600.00
2016 August $400.00
2016 September $500.00
2016 October $500.00
2016 November $500.00
2016 December $500.00
2017 January $600.00
2017 February $200.00
2017 March $500.00
2017 April $500.00
2017 May $500.00
2017 June $500.00
2017 July $500.00
2017 August $600.00
2017 September $500.00
2017 October $500.00
2017 November $500.00
2017 December $500.00
2018 January $500.00
2018 February $500.00
2018 March $500.00
2018 April $500.00
2018 May $500.00
2018 June $500.00
2018 July $500.00
2018 August $500.00
2018 September $500.00
2018 October $700.00
2018 November $700.00
2018 December $700.00
2018 January $700.00
2019 February (Check) $3,000.00
2019 February $700.00
2019 March $700.00
2019 April $700.00
2019 May $700.00
2019 June $700.00
2019 July $700.00
2019 August $700.00
2019 September $1,667.00
2019 October $1,667.00
2019 November $1,667.00

It’s pretty raw.  I could of changed the font, color, maybe added a majestic mountain in the background but that’s not how this process works. It’s black and white. It’s one line at a time bringing it down.

And it’s so much more than that!!!

Emotions

I’m guessing if you’re reading this your debt amount might be high, and if that’s the case feeling hopeless initially is natural.  God knows I did. On top of that I even sprinkled on embarrassed, worthless, and a failure as a man and husband.  Yes, I always go big with everything especially being hard on myself.  In an effort to not have to face these I just ignored them.  Swept those emotions in a pile, tucked them under the rug, and shut off the light.  I mean really what else was there to do.  When I’d acquire more debt, I’d spout things like just this one more time, we deserve this, or just fuck it.  So okay you’re saying I do indeed feel like shit but what am I going to do?

Just like many things in life that cause instant pleasure; they will eventually bring much discomfort.  You will need to get to the point where the increase in debt is causing you more pain then looking at your shit swept under the rug.  Believe me you might be able to go a very long way getting deeper and deeper but DON’T!

I of course went the long way.  So long my back was painted into a corner. So pathetic I, 49 years old then, had to ask my 79 year old mom at the time for a loan to pay it all off.  I was indeed fortunate because bankruptcy was nipping at my ankles.  Like I said in the other post this was me right after being divorced and on top of everything else I was paying alimony.  The complete lowest time of my life in so many ways.

Mindset

So what do you do you do when you’re feeling hopeless, embarrassed, worthless, failure, and pathetic?  For me, I got pissed, focused, and started doing the work.  You can too!  The whole debt problem in your life is “usually” caused by one thing.  Go into your bathroom and look in the mirror to find out.  I say usually because I know there are some life events you have no control over.  For those in that latter group, I’m so sorry you were thrown into this.  Either way that same person that you’re looking at will need to be your new hero.  While you’re at your mirror place a sticky note with I love you,  “You’re name here” written on it.  This is exactly what I did.  In order to move forward you need to change all those bad emotions above to love for yourself.  For now just know – Love Never Fails.  Did I mention you’re going to grow in so many ways during this process?

Homework 

You can’t half-ass pay off debt.  Believe me I attempted on again off again for many years. It doesn’t work.  You will need to crank up that emotional fire from within and get serious as hell.  This is your life.  This is your freedom and you don’t have to live in misery with debt for the rest of your life.

This is what has helped me whenever I want to change something in my life:

  • Reality.  Spell it out.  Lift up the rug and acknowledge the mess.  Write down how debt is fricking up your life.
  • Why.  Get clear on why you need to change now.  Write it down.
  • Immersion.  Surround yourself with others who have already accomplished what you want to do plus find a couple of folks who are in the process of changing.  So for our scenario search here on WP for others who have turned their life around by paying off their debt.  Read their posts, ask questions, and learn from them.  Also, read the comments of their posts to find others who are currently in the process like you.  Follow and befriend them.  You need a buddy to encourage and support back and forth.  I have used this process and know it works.  If you don’t already have a blog, this may be a great opportunity to share your debt journey and give and get support from others.  To me this WordPress community is priceless.
  • Learn.  Start reading everything you can on debt.
  • Yes, Dave Ramsey is one of my gurus.  Read Financial Peace & Total Money Makeover, and check out his  7 Baby Steps.  Subscribe to Dave Ramsey Show on YouTube.  Callers call in with their debt stories and Dave provides advice. 
  • William Danko, The Millionaire Next Door
  • Check out Melanie Lockert of DearDebt.com. (It’s not a WP site).  She paid off $81,000 in student debt.   I binge read all her posts when I first started my debt journey.  She very much inspired me!!
  • Big Bonus:  Read  Step #5 Monetary Goals blog post.  Lovie’s story will surely motivate you and provide you with an abundance of info on next steps!

Start your homework my friends.  It will be a very hard climb back uP, but many just like you are here to prove it can be done and your happiness and freedom depends on it!  You can do it!!

Peace,

Dwight

Debt 1

Debt 2

Goodness

What shields have you put up? What tribe mentality are you defending? Are you beyond tired? None of this seems right does it?

There IS Goodness all around us. We’ve just forgotten how to see it. Turn off all the noise and reconnect to your Source. Lay down your armor, stop fighting with yourself and others, and feel the peace within and around you. This knowing will start to shine brighter the more you lean into it.

Don’t forsake you daily practice of connecting, giving thanks, and most important asking to be an instrument of peace. Our responsibility is to spread love.