Fall update

 

 

 

 

 

Happy Fall!

I thought I’d provide an update on how all is going.  I started a Gerontology class about a month ago.  It goes for two semesters and I’ll end up with a certificate.  I’ve always been interested in working with the Aging and after reading Marc Freedman’s book, Encore:  Finding Work that Matters in the second half of life, I felt motivated to start looking into careers I could do that have a direct social “good” impact on humankind.  Over 25 years ago when I was in college,  I had made the decision to follow the money and go down the tech path even though back then I was interested in gerontology.  Now as I start looking for my second career,  I am in a position where I can explore different options that makes my soul smile.  It’s exciting.  It may not be for another 5 years,  but I thought why not explore now.  Marc’s book is a great read and I highly recommend it.  It’s about giving back to society and much much more.  Our generation hasn’t exactly made this planet a better place, but we still have time to leave a legacy we’re proud of.

I’m making good process on my emotional eating after getting sober.  I’m down approx. 15 pounds overall for the year.  It definitely has taken all the discipline I have, but more crucial looking into more of the Why I need “something” to escape my reality.  Understanding I’m not my thoughts and becoming the watcher has helped.   I’ve learned more about this with Michael Singer’s book, The Untethered Soul:  The Journey Beyond Yourself.  ….boy I’m plugging a lot of books,  eh :  )

Last month, was the last month for me paying maintenance and child support to my ex.  It’s probably a touchy topic for many who follow me, so I won’t be shooting off any fireworks.  Obviously, that frees up money that I now can put toward my debt.  As many of you know when I got divorced I had to get a loan from my mother, so I basically didn’t have to go bankrupt.  I’m happy to say that I’ll have that loan paid off at the end of November and be totally out of debt other than my house payment.  This is a whole new concept for me being debt-free.  Crazy how long it has taken me to figure it all out.  I’m 53.  I guess it’s not really crazy.  I’m a slow learner and always learn the hard way.

I just opened my I’m Done Drinking app and it reads I’ve been sober 234 days.  Things are going well on that front.  I don’t have cravings and am enjoying the clarity and hangover-free mornings.  You have to understand though it took me over 40 years to quit. I stopped, started,  repeated…many many times.  This year though it finally came to the point of being done for good and not looking back.  I cheer anyone who is on this journey!!!

That’s about it.  Been loving up the fall and getting out on hikes.  I feel like I’m supposed to be getting more social, but that push is more like a “living up to society” requirement and not one of my own right now.  We’ll see….

 

Sending Loving Vibes,

Dwight

Initial observations being Alcohol-Free

When I say initial it’s only been 19 days, but coming off tipping brews for 40 years this is quite the change. I haven’t had any real physical reactions being AF and attitude wise I’ve been pretty pumped up, BUT…  I have noticed this slithering around me in my shadows:

– I’ve been noticing in the last few weeks I’m oversensitive and have been overreacting quite a bit.  This leads to anger.  Who knows right,  I may have been experiencing this forever and am now just figuring this out being out of the fog.  I’ve thought it over and over and each day I got closer and closer to naming it.  My anger is coming from my shame and regret.  I realize this is all natural, it doesn’t make it any easier.  

I played the whole alcohol game for 40 years.  From never giving myself a fighting chance, to marriage, kids, divorce, divorced kids, heartbroken, and debt.  All heavily influenced by alcohol.  I do love that I finally figure it out, my life and health is improving, and  I’d NEVER GO BACK.  It’s just that bitter taste.  I’ve heard the phrase, sometimes you never get over it, but you get through it.

I wasn’t ready until now, I get that.  I’m already telling myself I did awesome for figuring it out now, but for right now there is that bitter taste.  So I’m doing my work and going to my shadows.  It’s not easy and I realize that.  It will take time for sure.

One last thing I’d like to say.  For all of you doing this AF work (or considering it) in your 20s, 30s, and 40s I so applaud you!  Its fucking hard work and some of the environments you find yourself in at that stage make it even harder.    No way around it.  You though are so courageous and smart for taking these steps to be AF now and not in your 50s.  The work will free YOU and allow your “YourNameHere”Ness to shine as it was intended to.  If applicable,  it may save a marriage and allow you to be proud of doing everything you could do for your kids,  OR  If applicable, becoming AF may allow you to free yourself from a bad situation.

This isn’t being written for any pity.  It’s just my observation of me and maybe it will help others.  Also, for those going AF later in life you will know your not that only one with these feelings.

I’m going to continue to grow, learn, and rock this new life!!  From the bottom of my heart, I thank you all for all your love and support!

* For those interested in learning more about alcohol and possibly exploring going AF check out these resources

  1. Read This Naked Mind by Annie Grace
  2. https://www.thisnakedmindcommunity.com
  3. https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/the-alcohol-experiment-registration

1 Week In – Alcohol Free

2-16-19: a new journey began

I’m in 1 week of my happily ever afterness of being sober! Well big whoop many may say..1 week…really?? Well it’s huge for a guy like me who’s been drinking alcohol for 40 years. Yep started dabbling with it at age 13. I grew up in a blue collar town where there was more bars then anything else. In high school we lived the whole sex, drugs, and rock n roll scene. Heck when you came into our front door of our home you were greeted with a 8 stool bar and asked what you drinking?

At 53, it’s just time for ME. I’ve toyed with idea of soberness for years now and I have finally gotten to the point where I’m just DONE with alcohol. More to come on this topic – baby steps just making it public.

In honor of this splendid direction of my life, I present to you a happy sober soul named Dwight David Hyde. Yes, I’m proud of me!!!

Feeling Great👍