Faded Jeans Living

From a drat I composed in December 2024:

What does it mean, I’m doing good?

For so many years I’m doing good.

What has been the doing part?

What is the good part?

It feels like the doing has been absolutely nothing.

The good something to answer back to the world.

I’m not sure anymore.

I’m not sure about anything.

I’m not sure how this is all supposed to work.

There was a brief time when I lived ferociously brave with life.

Granted I was 9 years old with no experience but just curiosity living each day from sunrise to sunset on full throttle.

I’m not sure about being in love.

I’m not sure about my job.

I’m not sure about how I’m living.

I’m not sure about family and friends.

I’m not sure I truly love myself.

I’m not sure about keeping my van.

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From current September 2025:

As I’m revisiting my blog, I came across this and thought, why not post it. Many of us have crafted these drafts knowing we’d probably never publish them, but it felt good to let it all out anyway. At 59, I KNOW I’m not alone having thoughts like this from time to time. Why not let others know they’re not alone either. I’m still not sure about many of the above items, but life doesn’t feel as heavy today as when I wrote that draft. Maybe that’s the takeaway. We ebb and flow with the same side of the coin of being human. The glimmers can stay dormant for months, and then one small flash can appear to carry us forward with hope and goodness. We must keep the faith.

These days I’m looking forward to my retirement in February 2026 and the changes that will bring. I’m looking forward to taking adventures in my van, exploring on my road/dirt motorcycle, meeting others via hiking groups, continuing my wellness journey, and chilling more and reading. Also, I’m aware I’m in the “4th Quarter” of my life, and want to add nothing but goodness to our tapestry.

It’s September 13th, 2025, and I’m in the NOW. I think I’m doing good. I’m grateful for where I’m at in my life, and the amazing souls that surround and support me.

Remember you’re not alone nor crazy. You’re a beautiful human .

Dwight 🦋

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As I return to blogging, I’d love suggestions for other WordPress blogs that have inspired you or brought you a sense of goodness.