Secret tears

I have a secret. Well I guess it won’t be after posting, but here goes. Not sure what triggered this urge to share other then feeling much love from you all on some comments and the next thing I know this memory pops into my head.

While my daughter was in high school she participated in choir all 4 years. This involved me going to the auditorium twice a year to go see their performances. I indeed did support my daughter, but the thought of dragging myself out of my sanctuary was always a bit of a rub. This was also when I was binge drinking periodically so brews were off the table for those nights. It was also after my divorce, so sitting alone wasn’t something to look forward to. Sometimes I got lucky and my son would join us.

Anyway, I’d go. As the lights dimmed In the auditorium I’d start feeling more relaxed and my nerves would calm. One by one the girls would walk out and line up on the bleacher stand on the stage. I’d closely watch each one enter from the side checking to see if it was my Allie. Once they were ready the choral director would signal to the pianist. There would be a small pause and then the first note struck and then beautiful voices would fill the air.

At that very point each time, my heart and soul would just dance and melt together. It brought me back to my youth like a time warp. As I watched each young soul on stage I thought of their beautiful beautiful beautiful innocence. I heard the sound of love coming from their voices and was just overwhelmed. I’d wonder what would happen to them once they left high school and how would life treat them. Would their dreams come true? Did they have dreams? How was their life up to this point? All these thoughts flowed in my head with again such innocence and wonder in them. What such great potential and love I saw in each one. As their voices sang loud and soft so did I. The walls within me slowly fell away, if only briefly, and I saw the angelical light surround them all.

As I sat and listened in that auditorium, I was thankful for them and that the lights were dimmed. For each time tears would flow down my cheek❤️

Life is so good and so precious,


16 responses to “Secret tears”

  1. This is so beautiful! Made me teary a little. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What a beautiful memory to share with us, Dwight, thank you. I can understand your reaction – there’s something about the innocence and potential of young people (with beautiful singing thrown in) to make us realise how incredible life is.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. That just pulled on my heartstrings! How much you love!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is so wonderful Dwight, I can so relate to this kind of feeling… there was a period where I would get it all the time… your story brings me back to how important it is to allow that “pink cloud” state (whether in sobriety or between it or anytime) to enter our soul… you’re a beautiful person.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Nadine for your kind words❤️.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Wow, such tenderness in your story. I look forward to reading your blog and will start at the beginning to get to know you better. Thanks for stopping by my blog. Lia

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I hope you’ve shared this with your daughter – I can’t tell you what something like this would have meant to me. Even now.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It’s interesting. I haven’t really talked to much about my blog to my kids. I guess I could copy it and send to her at some point. She’s 18 and I guess I feel she’d think I’m just silly. Who knows. You got me thinking❤️

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Dwight, I think if she just knew you were there, and it took you a better, light filled place, it would mean a lot to her, Just tell her. That would mean more than “here’s a link to my blog” in all probability.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. I agree with Liz. However you decide to share the story, I think she be moved by it.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. What a wonderful thought Dwight and let me say your daughter is lucky to have you as for her love you put aside your demons for those two night, not all fathers would do that.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. What a lovely tribute, Dwight. This is truly a memory to cherish.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. And this post is so good and so precious. Thanks for stopping by WTW and the follow Dwight! Not writing much these days- maybe as winter sets in I’ll be more inspired. It comes and goes with me.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. […] brought me to being led to this Post where I describe going to her choir concerts. At this point I had to put the iOfpad down and say […]


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